The Spider's Bite
by AerisSerris
Summary: When a spider bites Chris, Lindsay is sympathetic enough to bring him some soup. Will Chris realize feelings? Will Lindsay remember Chris's name? What's Chef's name? Find out now. Pairings inside. And just so we're clear: so not the owner of TDI.


**Hello everybody! **

**This is my first requested couple, and I'm loving it; Lindsay/Chris, requested by ****DarkMindedThinker89.**

**Main Couple: Lindsay/Chris**

**Side Couples: Izzy/Duncan, Sadie/Trent **

**This is for you, ****DarkMindedThinker89****!**

"AUGH!"

Chris looked up from his mountain of paper work (which was sliding 'accidentally' towards the shredder) to hear Lindsay run past his 'secret' office in the woods.

"CHRIS!"

The host finally decided to get off his bum and find out was wrong. Outside the window, Lindsay was looking terrified, her blue eyes big and scared. Chris opened the door, only to have Lindsay run in, screaming.

"Lindsay, what is wrong?" Chris asked, in a voice that almost reflected concern. _Almost._

"C-C-Cook Harvey was bit by a really big spider. It was big, brown, and ugly." Lindsay was crying, holding Chris like a teddy bear. No doubt that she was terrified, maybe scarred for life.

"Lindsay, you stay here. I'll be right back." Chris said, pulling her off of him.

Running through the woods, Chris was panicking. Who else would feed the campers gross food?! Plus, Chef was his buddy. What if the spider was poisonous?

Finally, Chris found what he was looking for. Duncan was outside the Mess Hall, trying to quiet a babbling Izzy, while Trent and Sadie were huddled in fear.

Chef was lying on a table, clutching a leg. "Chris, man! It was a brown recluse!" He was whimpering, his dark gray eyes big. Chris was lost, however.

"A brown recluse?"

"If it bites you, it'll swell like a regular snake bite, but after an hour, the flesh around it starts to decay and rot off! We are hours from a hospital!" Chef cried.

"Chef, dude, relax. I'll call someone." Chris tried to hide the fear in his own voice.

"Will Cook Harvey be okay?" Chris jumped.

"Lindsay! I told you to wait there!" The host scolded. Lindsay looked hurt.

"I'm sorry, Chip. But I didn't want the spider to hurt you, too!" She shook her head. "Besides, that's not important. Call the hospotile!"

"Hospotile?"

"The place that saves people!"

"Okay…" Chris rolled his eyes and pulled out his ChrisPhone, complete with ChrisPaper, a ChrisTone with its ChrisSong, _The Chris McLean Anthem_. "911? Yeah, this is Chris McLean – no, I do not host birthday parties! Look, a brown recluse has bitten my buddy here – not even for two hundred fifty! Just get a chopper here, in Muskoka. _Just get here!"_

Chris huffed, stuffing the phone in his pocket. Idiot cop, wanting a ChrisBirthday for his kid. Couldn't people read that he was not taking birthday requests?!

"Chip, are you okay?" Lindsay was looking at him with those big blue eyes, keeping his eyes away from another part of her body.

"I'm fine, Lindsay." He sighed, not convincing the blonde. Lindsay frowned.

"You're not okay! Don't lie to me, Chip!"

"I'm fine – " Chris protested, suddenly stopped by a sharp pain in his wrist. "Augh!" A big, brown, and hairy spider just bit him.

"THE BROWN RECLUSE!" Chef and Lindsay screamed, both pointing at the swelling spot on his arm. The brown recluse jumped onto the floor, trying to get away. Lindsay screamed, then smashed the spider with one of her cowgirl boots.

"Yay! All hail Lindsay, the Spider Slayer!" She smiled, put her chin up in the air, and put her arms at her side.

"Thanks, Lindsay!" Trent's eyes were big at the scene inside.

When the doctors came…

It was about an hour by the time the helicopters came. They were surprised to see that it was both Chef and Chris that had been bit, but they made no wasted time as the doctors got to work.

The flesh around Chef's bite was starting to decay, and Chris was more worried than he let on. Chef was his drinking buddy, his poker buddy! Just, in general, his buddy.

The doctors stopped treating Chef. "What's wrong?" Chris asked.

"Nothing. We've finished with him, Mr. McLean." The first – and only – female doctor said. Chris had not yet seen any of the doctors' faces, so this marked the first time. And Chris had to say,

"That doctor is hot!" This didn't come out of Chris's lips; it came out of Chef's. He didn't really say it, more like mouthed it. Chris, being the amazing Chris, could read lips, and knew what his pal was saying.

The doctor was Chris's length, seemed to be weighing a good 105 pounds or so. She was tan, just lightly golden. She had pale green eyes, ones that were very relaxed and focused on her job. Her hair was long, a deep mahogany brown. All in all, she was the definition of "a sight for sore eyes".

"Dr. Wright, please help me over here." One of the male doctors was already at Chris's side, preparing his vaccine. Which included a very long, and pointy, needle. Chris gulped; he wouldn't admit it, but his phobia had always been needles.

"_Christopher McLean, shots are not that bad!" Chris's mom was a short, plump woman with mouse-like eyes and shortly trimmed black hair that was already starting to gray._

_  
"But mom – "_

_  
"No 'buts', Christopher. Just get your flu vaccine, and then you can go play with little George Hatchet." Chris's mom was very tired at this point, and Chris knew better than to protest at this point. Whenever he did, spankings and a grounding were on the way._

_Chris sat in the chair, wincing at the sight of the needle. Long, and pointy. _Just how I like them. _Chris thought, gulping. _

_The horror movie (The Pit of Needles) that George made him watch last night popped into his head, all the scenes in which they were tortured with long needles; put into their noses, stuck in their eyes; and all the blood. _

_The needle was coming his way. _I don't want to die! _Chris thought. It was just an inch away. _

_  
"NO!" Chris screamed, making the doctor drop the needle. It fell into Chris's arm; the point was seen visibly at the other sight, the blood welling up. "AUGH!"_

Chris shuddered. The needle was coming his way. Thoughts of his childhood and The Pit of Needles movie came back into his head. It was just an inch away.

"NO!" It all happened again; the male doctor dropped the needle; it fell into his arm; the point seen so visibly at the other side. "AUGH!" And, of course, the blood.

_**8:00, PM**_

Chris blinked open. He couldn't get to sleep.

He was in none other than the "Hospital Tent", being nursed for both a brown recluse bite and a needle being pulled out of his arm.

Chef was sleeping soundly on the other bed, his bite starting to heal up. They trimmed away the dead flesh, and he was looking a lot better.

Chris was saved from his bite, as the doctors removed the needle, then gave him the shot when he didn't expect it. It was just a pinch, and Chris felt immensely stupid.

_Way to overreact, McLean. _He thought bitterly.

"Chip?"

Chris stood up in his bed, looking to the entrance. Lindsay was standing at the entrance, a bowl of delicious smelling soup in her hands. "Lindsay, what are you doing up?"

"Whenever I'm sick, my mom makes me a bowl of soup. I wanted you to get better, so I brought you some soup." Her blue eyes were visible, shining brighter than the moon through the pitch-blackness of the tent. Chris's stomach growled with hunger, yet the host kept his cool as he replied.

"I wouldn't say no to a hot meal. Come over." Lindsay gave a wide smile, walking over and setting the tray on Chris's bed. For someone so stupid, Lindsay made for a great cook. Just not at sushi.

"Thanks, Lindsay." He said, putting a spoonful into his mouth. It was warm, and Chris was instantly reminded of his childhood; being sick, his mom giving him soup. "Where did you learn to cook like this?"

"My mom taught me how to make soup whenever me or Paula or Stephanie gets sick, so she doesn't have to cook for me or Paula or Stephanie all the time." Lindsay explained. Chris shrugged.

"Well, good. At least you know how to cook. That'll make some guy happy some day."

The thought of beautiful Lindsay, in a sweeping white dress and a bouquet of flowers, facing a tall and faceless stranger, made Chris struggle with a sudden, violent wave of jealousy. Then the idea of Lindsay, in her dress, facing Chris in a tuxedo, made him feel much better.

Chris blinked. _No, I don't have a crush on Lindsay. _His insides screamed in protest, leaving the host in confusion. _Or do I…? _Many illegal thoughts seemed to swarm in his head, and he tried his best to throw them away.

"Does it make you happy?" Lindsay seemed not to know what she was saying, and Chris's cheeks went a slight shade of pink. The darkness of the tent covered it up, though, to Chris's silent thanks.

"Er…"

"Yay!" Lindsay wrapped her arms around Chris's neck, closing her eyes, one leg in the air. Chris struggled to keep his tray from spilling and to get Lindsay off of him.

"Geroff me." Chris hissed, hardly able to breathe through Lindsay's "unmentionables". Lindsay broke off.

"Sorry. But mom says that if you're nice to someone, they'll be nice back!"

"I'm not nice already?" Chris raised an eyebrow. Lindsay looked confused, and the host snickered.

"You could be a bit nicer, Chip…" She started off, blushing hot pink.

"Yeah, I probably could be. And it's _Chris, _Lindsay."

"Sorry, Charlie." Chris sighed.

"It's Chris, it's Chris, it's Chris!" He finally snapped. Lindsay's blue eyes started to water up, filling the host with guilt. "I didn't mean that – "

It was too late. Lindsay ran out of the tent, sobbing deeply. Chris sat there, wishing she was still there calling him Chip, then to be gone and call him Chris.

**What do you think? I went for a sad, a little dramatic. I might make it a two-shot. Anybody agree?**

**~AerisSerris.**


End file.
